When Desmond Dick decided he wanted to help his classmates to understand how his brain works, he had no idea he would end up speaking to a national audience about autism.
The eight-year-old Skwo:wech Elementary School student is one of the featured speakers at Autism Canada’s Au-Some Conference on Saturday, Oct. 22. The virtual conference features a day of presentations by autistics about a variety of topics related to living with autism.
Desmond will be one of them, sharing a pre-recorded video presentation that originally came to be last year, when he was in Grade 2.
“I wanted to share my story,” he explained. He wanted his classmates to understand “how I’m unique and special” — why he has a helper in the classroom, and why he sometimes needs to go outside to take breaks.
So, with help from his mom, Sara, Desmond put together a presentation about himself: how his brain works, why his amygdala sometimes goes into a high alert state and what happens to his hippocampus when that happens. It helped his classmates to understand what they should do when Desmond’s “amygdala alarm” goes off: how they should give him space, help him to take some deep breaths, and get an adult for help.
Importantly, too, it helped to shine a light on all the things Desmond and his classmates have in common — simple kid things, like the fact that he likes swimming and skateboarding, and that he doesn’t like spiders, bread, pasta, pizza or being teased.
“It felt very powerful being in the classroom; the understanding and the respect — the little things, like, he wants to have friends, just like any other kid wants friends. He doesn’t like being teased, just like everyone doesn’t like being teased. There was such a strong sense of similarity through it,” Sara said.
Desmond and Sara also came up with the idea of creating flower bouquets with tissue-paper flowers, with different colours of flowers designated to represent different aspects of kids’ personalities; building their bouquets together, the kids again discovered they had more in common than not.
During the presentation, Desmond and Sara presented the students with some gifts: books courtesy of the Canucks Autism Network and pop-it fidget toys from Autism Canada. It was Sara’s request to Autism Canada for the fidget toys that brought Desmond’s presentation to their attention — and, eventually, to recorded video format for use at this weekend’s conference.
He’ll also continue working with the organization as an advocate after this weekend.
'He was struggling to figure out how to be in this world'
For Desmond’s parents, Sara and Graeme, seeing their son so confident and ready to share his own personal autism story is a reminder of just how far they’ve come over the past few years.
It was July 2019, just before Desmond started kindergarten, when they first received a diagnosis of ADHD. Then the COVID-19 pandemic hit, schools shut down, and life was turned upside down — and Desmond’s challenges with extreme anxiety proved to be the catalyst for his autism diagnosis in the summer of 2020.
“We didn't know how to support him, but we saw him desperately needing support,” Sara said. “And he wasn't the confident kid you see today; he was struggling to figure out how to be in this world.”
Both Sara and Graeme credit the team of people who’ve helped them navigate the journey since, starting with their first connection to a psychiatrist at B.C. Children’s Hospital.
They’re also overflowing with gratitude for the school community at Skwo:wech that has supported Desmond, and the whole family, every step of the way: all his teachers in the Montessori program; the EAs, resource teachers and behaviour support workers who’ve been part of his learning journey.
For Sara, that’s all part of the inclusive school community that’s being fostered by vice-principal Darren Elves and principal Kathleen Chad.
“Honestly, I have to say, the way Kathleen and Darren create an inclusive school is such a testament to how everybody has responded. We’ve never had a bad teacher experience — which, when you're in the ADHD and autistic community, is not heard of. You see the Facebook groups, and they fill you with terror of going into schools,” Sara said. “And yet we've walked into the school, and from Day 1, through all the rough moments, I've never felt anything but a bear hug — like just, ‘We've got your back, we'll take care of this. You're good.’”
Just the other day, out of the blue, Desmond asked his mom whether she could send an email to Mr. Elves and Ms. Chad “and tell them that I love them and I love going to school because they’re there,” Sara recounts with a smile.
Knowing that both Desmond and his seven-year-old brother, Lloyd, love going to school every day makes life just that much easier.
“They have created such a warm, welcoming, accepting community. It’s really impressive the school that they've created, and we're so lucky that we joined this school and that we're in this district, because you can see it's a priority,” Sara said.
Now, having a chance to share his story on the national stage — and in his local newspaper, for his New Westminster community to see — gives Desmond a chance to feel celebrated and supported by the world he works so hard to be part of.
“He just feels this empowerment of, ‘You know, there are a lot of things in life that are difficult. But I'm taking something that makes me a little different and creating a power around it,’” Sara says. “And it’s really beautiful to see.”
Follow Julie MacLellan on Twitter @juliemaclellan.
Email Julie, [email protected]
(Author's note: Along with reporting for the New West Record, I am also a Skwo:wech Elementary parent.)
